What's wrong with this picture?

So I just found out that my best friend in high school is engaged to her guy best friend in high school. She's fatter than me and some how she's getting everything she wants. She was in band in high school and I guess she's always been pretty popular.. But damn. What the hells wrong with me? I'm fat, but I can make it look decent. Is it my glasses? Do I look like a nerd or something? Fuck. I'm so tired of being fat. I didn't realize that on top of that I was ugly too? That's it. I'm going to live at the gym. I'm not going to have anything at work. I'm going to stick with no food after 7. No soda. No ice cream. Just water. 500 calories a day. No more weed. No more social life until I start losing weight. What's the point in satisfying food and drink cravings if you're fat? I guess that's why you'd be fat. I'm so fucking tired of feeling left behind; forced to watch my friends live my dreams. I'm sorry that this post is full of ranting and venting. Here's my new workout plan: cardio every day, arms monday and tuesday, abs/back wednesday and thursday, legs/butt friday and saturday; if I go on sunday it will just be cardio. Plus I want to go to hawaii in the summer, so my goal is to at least be in the 140s if not less... We'll see how far down I can get by then.. Here goes nothing.